Testimonials
If your ears are still husked, please listen to the testimony of people just like you!
“Everyone always asks me what the secret to my award-winning cornbread recipe is, but really I just pray to The Corn King and let Him take the wheel! And then give Him the first slice as an offering.”
“ Ever since we put that shrine to the Corn King in the fire station, we’ve noticed a downturn in field fires that require our intervention. The King sends the rains to protect His Sacred Crop! ”
“I found my way back into the Rows of The Eternal Harvest after my father died, and I had to take over the farm. It brings me so much comfort to know that pops is safe in the field of The Corn King, and that they’re both watching over me and guiding my hands while I learn the ins and outs of pig farming (corn fed only, of course).”
“I love the Corn King because He makes the spiders go away! They’re gonna get eat up [sic]! Popcorn? ”
“I really did think all this Corn King business was old wives’ tales and horsefeathers, but wouldn’t you know, I skipped out on my tithe last harvest and this year my field caught on fire and my boy came down with corn pox! ”
“The Corn King truly has blessed me in all I do. Mention this pamphlet at Margie’s Field of Treasures for 10% off Americana collectibles! One discount per customer.”